Day 21-26: Canada's The Worst

July 26th-31st, 2014


So our adventurous trip came to an end on Saturday. It really was a sad day. There may or may not have been tears involved. Hint: there was.

We said adios to Nikki and Alaska, drove about 400 miles, crossed the border into Canada, and camped at some random campground in Beaver Creek, YT. Unfortunately I didn't have any service, because service doesn't exist in BFE, so I couldn't live tweet crossing the border with Laur, but the customs guy was much nicer this time around. He thanked us for coming into his country, as he should, because it's a privilege for a country to be graced by the VanSumeren's. All I remember from the drive is that there was an unnecessary amount of construction. Canada's version of construction consists of putting up a sign that says "Slow" and then throwing down a bunch of rocks and gravel and calling it good. Oh and we also saw another glacier (because we haven't seen enough of those already). But this one was actually pretty big, so it was neat-o

Matanuska glacier. 

The campground we stayed at was one that was literally in the middle of nowhere. Their sign said they had wifi, but what they didn't say was that I'd have to sit on a chair in the bathroom to use it, because that's the only placed they actually had wifi. So I did that. And I was judged. 


Sunday we drove some more and got to Watson Lake, YT. We drove around 500 miles. Nothing really happened Sunday, except that we saw a lot of black bears. Mom still wouldn't let me hug them, so it was pretty much the worst day ever. Mom also said she saw a wolf, but it was really probably just a jaguar or something. Dad wanted to play his iPod via the aux cable in the bus and so to grant the princess his wish, we did. Mom and I were having a pretty solid jam sesh until dad yelled at us for singing and having fun. Apparently that's NOT what you're supposed to do when you're stuck in a motor home in the middle of nowhere.  It was also Matt's birthday so we called and serenaded him. That was about all that happened Sunday. Sorry we're boring.


On Monday, we went from British Columbia to Alberta and drove through the Canadians Rockies. Apparently those mountains are a lot different than any other mountain we saw, because mom and dad yelled and woke me from my slumber. We saw probably a million buffalo heading south, but none of them were mom's BFF Elvis, so she was disappointed. We also finally saw big horned sheep!!! Mom has been saying how this trip hasn't been worth it because we haven't seen them (she's so dramatic). Word on the street is that dad's trying to take credit for pointing out the sheep to us, even though they were right in the middle of the road and were impossible to miss... (love ya dad). The campground we stayed at was a cute little one, but the bathrooms were honestly the smelliest bathrooms on the entire planet. Not even being dramatic here. They. Were. The. Worst.


Tuesday was my birthday (happy birthday to me, I'm an adult now). We peaced early in the morning and mom treated me to Tim Horton's, using my credit card. Since it's Tim Horton's, you'd think they'd know how to make a drink, or even just make a drink. I ordered an iced chai and was instead given a hot cup of milk and a tea bag. Ok TH, that's cool. The pack of Timbits I also ordered were delicious, so that made up for my failed chai, but still. We continued our trek across Alberta until we found a restaurant to dine at for my birthday, because it'd been like 4 hours since we had last put food into our body, so we were all feeling a little weak. We ended up going to this fancy steakhouse. Since the drinking age in Canada is 18 and I'm 20 year old adult, I ordered an adult beverage and felt like a baller. I don't know really know what I drank, but it had tequila and vodka and was delicious. Dad ordered a beer and so together we got TANKEDDDDDDD. Not really though, but still. Oh, but it was at this time that dad made a deal to go shot for shot with me on my 21st birthday, so you heard it hear, folks. Dad's getting wild on July 29th, 2015. If he doesn't, he owes me $1,000,000. After we feasted, we carried on to somewhere and ended at some campground. When we got there, the campground was technically closed. But we waited creepily until "security" showed up. Security ended up being the owner and he was such a nice old man and gave us a site to stay at so we slept our little hearts away.

EDIT: Mom wants me to share with all y'all that Tuesday was the first day we did not drive through a mountain range since like day 2 of the trip. The cornfields and plains really made for an exciting drive. Not.

On Wednesday we woke up at like 4am to head out (4am meaning 7am). Dad needed his chai latte to get him through his strenuous naps so we went probably a good 20 minutes out of the way to go to Starbucks. He'll try to tell you that I was the one pushing for Starbucks. Don't believe him. We drove through Saskatchewan and had to make an appearance in Saskatoon because mom just likes saying that name. Fracking is a pretty big deal here in Canadia, so we saw a bunch of semis and oil trucks and other fracking equipment (I don't know what all that entails, but we saw it). Wednesday was the first day this entire trip that we ran into rain. Of course I was the one who had to drive the bus through it while everyone was sleeping and was white knuckling it the entire time, but don't worry about me, I'm sure my arthritis isn't a big deal. We crossed the border into the US (FINALLLLYYYYY), but first we had to get the motor home strip searched, because we're a family of crooks. The border patrol made us pull over and tore apart the whole bus to make sure we didn't have any drugs or vegetables or fruit. Ok, I lied, we didn't get strip searched, but the guy really did come into the motor home to take a look around. The motor home was a bit messy, so naturally mom was embarrassed for the mess. She said that if she had known we were going to have company, she would've cleaned it up a bit. We drove the rest of the day and ended up at some rinky-dink city park in Granville, ND. There were probably 10 open sites that were a free-for-all. We spent about a half hour trying to find a level site and moved about 8 times and were completely judged by all 4 residents of the campground. After we finally got a semi-level one, mom and I played Rummey and I kicked her butt. I believe the score was 530 to 360. I would put a picture of the score sheet as proof, but mom threw it out because she's embarrassed that I alienated her. Dad Facebooked and checked AOL news some more during our vicious game. When it was time to get ready for bed, mom wanted to try her hand at piggy backing dad to transfer him. She did it with no problem until she said, "squats for days, am I right?" Then I had a problem because no. She just shouldn't say that (love ya ma).


So it's now Thursday morning. We woke up at 6:30am, on the road by 7:30. We're still driving through North Dakota and I'm convinced this state is almost as bad as Canada. There's no Starbucks so that makes it even worse. The plan is to get back to Houghton tonight, where mom and dad will stay until Saturday, then they'll head back to Goodrich.


I'll do a few more finals posts when we touch down. Sorry this is like a week late. 

Peace, y'all. 

Generational Travel Difference # 16: Cruise Control

Us:  Turn on cruise control feature when on long, boring stretches of road where speed is constant and braking is minimal.

Her:  Turn on cruise control feature every time you start the vehicle.  Set it at maximum allowable speed limit plus 5 in both city and highway conditions, light and heavy traffic. Use the right shoulder of the road to pass any vehicle in front of you that is going slower than you rather than hitting the brake and disengaging the cruise control feature.



- L

Generational Travel Difference #6: Mountain Viewing, Part III

Us:  "Wow!  The Canadian Rockies are gorgeous!  Take a picture of them reflecting off of the water."

Her:  "OMG!!!  We have seen mountains for three weeks!  They all look the same - nobody even knows the difference!!!"

-L

Generational Travel Difference #5: Mountain Viewing, Part II

Us:  "We are in the Cascade Mountains and have been driving through them for three hours.  We don't need to go to the top to say we were here.  This counts!"

Her:  "What's the point of even coming then!"  


- L

Generational Travel Difference # 4: Mountain Viewing, Part I

Us:  "Isn't Mt. Rainier awesome?  Take a picture"

Her:  "I have, like, thirty of them.  Stop at the next pull-out so I can get another one"




- L

Day 20: It's All Downhill From Here

July 25th, 2014


Friday was our last day in Alaska. Twas a sad(dish) day. 

We headed to Alyeska in Girdwood. Alyeska's a pretty popular ski resort in AK. I would say it's more for those who can do the triple black diamonds without peeing themselves, because the mountain basically just goes straight down. There is no slope to it whatsoever. So in the winter, people obviously ski and snowboard down the mountain and in the summer, insane people hike up it. We don't participate in physical activity in this family, so we took a tram ride up to the top of the mountain. 

This was part of the view from the tram. Dad wouldn't jump out, don't know why..

Once we got to the top of the mountain, we had a little photo shoot because we're such a good looking family.

Cutie mom and dad, with some hottie in the background photobombing.

Another attempt at a family selfie. Mom had a bug go in her ear that she later claimed crawled into her brain. Ok ma, whatever you say.

After we were done modeling, we went inside a little sandwich cafe at the top of the mountain and ate, because we haven't done that enough already this trip. I don't remember what I got, I just know that I inhaled it and it was delicious. 

Mom wants me to share with you about the hygiene of this cafe. When we first sat down, there was a sad looking woman who was cleaning the tables. We didn't notice anything unusual until she started cleaning the tables near us. Can you guess what she was cleaning the tables with? Wellllll let me tell you. It was a mop. She was cleaning the tables with a floor mop. Let's just say she probably won't be getting employee of the month anytime soon.

After we judged the woman cleaning and stuffed our faces some more, we decided our time at Alyeska was done. But only because there was literally nothing else to do. Once we peaced, we drove down to Palmer, AK and set up camp there for the night. When we got there, I asked dad if I could give him a piggy back ride from the car to inside the motor home (usually when I transfer him, it's just from the car to his chair). It took maybe 0.2 seconds for him to agree and 0.3 seconds for mom to tell dad he was stupid for trusting me. I unfortunately didn't make it up the steps in the motor home so I just dropped dad on the ground. Just kidding. But I really almost did. Once we were all good again, mom, Nikki, and I played Rummey and dad Facebooked and checked AOL news (because it's such a reliable source for the latest updates in the world). Then we slept our little hearts away.

AAAAAAaaaaaaaand that was Friday.

Day 19: "Whale Watching" Doesn't Always Mean Whale Watching

July 24th, 2014


Thursday, dad and I had reservations to go whale watching in the Kenai Fjords, while mom and Nikki had date day and did whatever they did. Before I go on about our whale watching adventure, let me just tell you this- DON'T GO ON A WHALE WATCHING TOUR, EXPECTING TO SEE WHALES. YOUR DREAMS WILL BE CRUSHED.

So here's how it went down. We got to the little Kenai Fjords dock and got our tickets and get on the boat. That should've been my first clue that the tour was going to be a rough one. There was about a solid 8 inch lift from the dock to the boat and there we had dad in his wheelchair and me trying to lift him up over this huge step. So after one of the workers saw me struggling and sweating profusely, they came and helped and we finally got dad in the boat. We waited for the rest of the world to board the boat, then we were off.

About 10 minutes into the tour, we saw some Doll's porpoises (I think that was their name). They're basically mini killer whales. Or they at least look like them. The porpoises were about the only wildlife we saw on our way to Fox Island, which is where we feasted for lunch. Seriously. We ate like royalty. There was a buffet with salmon and prime rib, then dad and I had a pound of Alaskan King Crab and continued to stuff our faces until we hated ourselves. 

After lunch, we had about 20 minutes until we could get back on the boat. In that 20 minutes, dad and I looked for someone to take our picture with the cutie little mountains in the background. It wasn't until like minute 19 that we finally found someone because literally every single person looked ticked off and completely unapproachable. But oh well, we got our picture so we were happy.

Look at how cute we are.

We had about 2 and a half hours left of the tour once we got back on the boat. Since it was a whale watching cruise, we had some pretty high expectations of seeing, you know, whales. Yeah, not the case. The captain took our boat out onto open water for a solid 10 minutes, then decided that the seagulls near shore were more interesting. So for the rest of the tour, we rode along the coast and looked at 3 different types of birds. That was it. 

Looking back, dad and I were probably a little bit more bitter than necessary. I mean we did see some sea lions getting their tan on and sea otters doing little tricks. But if you're going to advertise your tour as a "whale watching" tour, then you should probably spend more than 10 minutes actually looking for whales, you know? The scenery on the tour was neat though and the crab was delish, so I guess it's all good.


After our adventure at sea, mom and Nikki picked us up and we continued on exploring. We headed to Kenai Fjords National Park to see Exit Glacier, which is the only glacier in the park that you can drive to see. It was a cute glacier. But all glaciers pretty much look exactly alike, so it wasn't anything spectacular. Well, it was, because it was massive. But you know what I mean. On our hike back from the glacier, I'm pretty sure we almost got eaten by a bear. It's recommended that you talk or whistle while in the woods so that bears know you're there. But for the 0.2 seconds we didn't say anything, we heard rustling in the bushes right next to us. I've never seen a pregnant woman or my mom run that fast. I was pushing dad in his wheelchair and sprinting. It's a good thing he didn't fall out because we all would've probably just left him there. (Just kidding dad. Kind of).

Neat little (big) glacier.. It's the ice on the mountain, for those of you who don't know..

Cutie fam. We're still trying to perfect the selfie.

Once we were done glaciering and outrunning bears, we headed to Starbucks, got some chai, and went back to the campground to play Rummey and eat microwave s'mores. I tell ya, we're really rugged when it comes to this whole camping thing. It's a tough life.

Day 18: "Elvis, Are You A Loser?"

July 23rd, 2014


I forgot to add that when we went to the Salmon Bake on Tuesday, mom wrote my number on the bill for our waiter, but didn't put the area code so now my dream of my mom setting me up with a waiter is crushed because he didn't have my whole number. So Tony at the Salmon Bake in Denali, if you're reading this, call me - area code 810 ;)

Also, here's a cutie pic of dad with Nuna, the obsessive sled dog at Denali:

On Wednesday we drove to Seward, AK, because we haven't done enough driving this trip. But before we did that, we went to Moose's Tooth in Anchorage. It's a neat little brewery/restaurant that makes quite possibly the world's best pizza. Mom, dad, and Nikki split 2 different pizzas, while I had my own. The three of them were quite the disappoint, as they only finished like 2 and a half pieces between the three of them, while I finished 2 pieces by myself. Each pizza had 4 slices, so we're not as skinny as it sounded. On the way down to Seward we stopped at the Alaskan Wildlife Conservation Center. It's basically a place where orphaned animals are sent after they're rescued (I think). So there were moose(s?), bears, bison, elk, and caribou. 

The animals were totally all up in our grills and it was cool, yet utterly terrifying.

Take this moose, for example. He was all calm and collected, but could've lost his cool and attacked us in 0.2 seconds. He didn't though, which was nice of him. I forgot to take a selfie with him though, so that was the disappointment of the day.

Then check out this bear. He ripped that poor salmon to shreds and could've easily done the same to me. He didn't, though. But only because we were separated by an electric fence.

During our tour of the conservatory, mom made a new friend:

This bison, who she named Elvis, kept following us. So naturally mom tried to strike up a conversation with him. I have a video of part of their convo on my phone, but it went along the lines of her asking why he had no friends and why he was such a loser and when he was going to get a haircut. All I can say is thank god no one was around to hear her. 

After the conservatory, we eventually made it to Seward and set up camp and chilled for the night, because we're such party animals. 

Day 16 & 17: "Is That Mt. McKinley?"

July 21st & 22nd, 2014

I had to take an exam for my online class and University of Alaska-Fairbanks, so that's why my blogging has been so spread out. I've been being a good little pupil and studying my heart away.

But to continue on with our adventure:

Monday, Nikki had a doctor's appointment and we got an oil change for the ol' rig (I know you wanted to know about both of these). After we did that, we trekked down towards Denali National Park, which is southwest of Fairbanks. We didn't actually go into the park. Instead, we just went to a restaurant called The Salmon Bake. (Seriously like every restaurant in Alaska is called "The Salmon Bake". This state seems to lack originality). Since that was all we did on Monday, I'll tell you about the restaurant. You're welcome in advance.It was a cutie little shack on the side of a mountain. And for some reason, whoever built it decided that instead of making the building level, they would make the building go with the surrounding landscape instead, aka the whole restaurant was on a slant and everything slide downwards. So it was a very interesting dinner, to say the least. Most of it was spent trying to make sure none of dad's beer spilled on Nikki and that he wouldn't just fall over and do a face plant in his food. We had gotten an appetizer to split, then I think Nikki and dad got elk sliders, mom got falafel, and I got this buffalo soup or whatever (because you all care about this). After we inhaled the appetizer and were completely stuffed before our entrees came out, we made a mini pact that we wouldn't order anymore appetizers at dinner because we were always so full that we hated ourselves. We discovered later on that this pact was pointless because we ended up ordering appetizers and hating ourselves anyways. So that was Monday.

Tuesday we actually headed to the park. We were on a mission to see Mt. McKinley. We think we saw it, but there's really no way to tell since literally every single mountain looks the same. According to some sign on the side of the road, only 30% of people actually see Mt. McKinley. So we're going to pretend we're part of that 30%. Once we finished driving through Denali, we headed over to the sled dog kennels. The sled dogs are what I live for. Seriously. We had gotten there just in the nick of time because there was a sled dog demonstration that was about to start. The woman who was presenting was super awkward, but the presentation itself was pretty neat. She talked about how the dogs are used to haul heavy stuff back and forth in the winter throughout the park. The more she went on about the dogs, the more I decided that dog mushing was my calling. So look for me in the next Iditarod. During the demonstration though, the lady hooked up the dogs and rode them around. She didn't offer me a ride, which I thought was rude, but it's whatever. After the demonstration was done and over with, we went and played with the dogs. Since there were so many witnesses, it would've been too obvious for us to steal one of the dogs, so we're hoping our plans will work out next time. Last time NIkki and I went, all of the dogs were available to play with, but this time there were only 5 dogs we could snuggle. Dad went up to one of the dogs and for whatever reason, this dog was super interested in him. Nuna (the dog) kept sniffing his wheelchair and going under the blanket he had and was just all about dad and giving him some loving. When we got back to the motor home, Oscar wasn't too pleased that dad had been cheating on him. 

After we visited the cutie dogs, we packed up and drove down to Anchorage. I can't remember if we went out to eat or not, but I'm assuming we did and I'm assuming it was delicious and I'm assuming I hated myself afterwards.


Uhh I don't think we did anything else Tuesday, besides j-chill.

I'll probably binge-blog (is that a thing?) tonight and fill you in on the rest of the week. BUT UNTIL THEN, ADIOS.

Day 9-15: The Past Week

July 14th-20th, 2014

Oh dang, my bad ya'll. I didn't realize it had been an entire week since I've posted to keep you updated on our oh-so-exciting lives. I know you're all just sitting at the edge of your seats at your computers, constantly refreshing the page, hoping to see what we're up to next. (I hope you're really not doing that, but if you are, thank you for thinking I'm semi-interesting).

So to fill you all in: We finally made it to Alaska. It's been quite the week for us world travelers.

On Monday & Tuesday (7/14 & 7/15), we had no service. Literally none. It was basically the longest two days of our entire lives, although mom seemed to struggle more than I did. I believe her exact words were, "Oh c'mon, even Apollo 13 only lost service for 12 minutes!!!". Ok drama queen, calm down. I think she was mostly upset because she couldn't Facebook humiliating pictures of dad or make smart-aleck comments to anyone. However, I'm currently taking 2 online classes, so I think I had a right to be dramatic. I emailed my professors the other day to let them know about my lack of service, but I really don't think they believe the whole "I'm driving to Alaska in a motor home & am in the middle of BFE, Canada" excuse. After all, it's the oldest one in the book. But you never know.  

All we did Monday and Tuesday was drive for literally 14 hours each day. We landed in Tok, AK Tuesday night, which is about 3 hours outside of Fairbanks. I don't remember much else besides we woke up at 6am, left at 7am and didn't do anything besides drive. Honestly, I can't even tell you how large my cankles are. I've never been so embarrassed. We did, however, see like, a million moose and bears on our drive. I wanted to stop and give them all bear hugs (haha get it?) but mom and dad wouldn't let me, I don't know why. We were all a little upset that we didn't see big-horned sheep, caribou, or Sasquatch, even though there were signs to watch for all three.

We arrived in the grand ol' city of Fairbanks on Wednesday (7/16) at about noon o'clock. We did the exciting activity of washing the motor home. When we were finished with that fun, we headed to Pioneer Park to meet up with Nikki Poo for her kick off event for her work. She works at the Fairbanks Chamber of Commerce and this week is apparently a huge deal for this ginormous city, as it's Golden Days (you can hit up Google or Nikki for more info).

We headed down to the Golden Days kickoff and received chips and a drink as soon as we walked in, so that's how you know it was going to be a good event. The kickoff itself was like a mini carnival. There was food, games, and FUN! I think the most exciting thing though was that we saw a donkey. Then, just when we thought we had seen it all, we saw three girls taking selfies with said donkey. We also had our first "real" meal in a week (since mom was starving us) of hot dogs, crepes, and ice cream. As you'll find out later, Wednesday night was the beginning of our travels down the road to obesity.

After we were done shoving our faces and being judged by locals for constantly having food in our hands, we said our goodbyes to Nik and then came back to the motor home and passed out because this 4 hour time difference is finally catching up to us.

With Nikki busy with her Golden Days events, that left me to be our tour guide for Thursday, Friday, & Saturday, soooooo we mostly just stayed at the crib. But after the thrilling events of washing clothes and napping on Thursday, we went to the Alaska Salmon Bake at Pioneer Park. All I can say is holy crap. So, so, so good. It was an all-you-can-eat seafood buffet with crab, salmon, cod, and prime rib, and also a salad bar so you can pretend you're not totally fat. I tried a little bit of everything (it was all you can eat, don't judge me), and let's just say I was in a food coma the rest of the night and didn't eat until lunchtime on Friday. So that was our Thursday.


Friday (7/18), we didn't see Nikki at all, so we got really lucky there (just kidding Nikki Poo, love you, xoxoxoxoxo). So when we finally got up and moving at 1pm, we decided to hit up Chena Hot Springs (http://www.chenahotsprings.com/ -- in case you were wondering about what the heck they are). We graced the resort with our presence at about 2pm and bought tickets for an ice museum tour (http://www.chenahotsprings.com/ice-museum-renewables/) at 3pm. We were obviously hungry at that point, so we sat down at Chena's cutie little restaurant for some grub. We got seated and everything at about 2:20 and only had about a half hour before the tour. Well, we're champs and mowed down and inhaled everything in legit 25 minutes. Not even joking. People stared. Once we got our bill and mom told me I couldn't write my number on it for our hot waiter because I'd look too desperate, we headed over for our fancy little ice museum tour. 

For those of you too lazy to click the link, I don't blame you, it's not worth the effort. The ice museum is literally a museum made of ice with ice sculptures in it. It's the only ice museum in the country, and I think world? But it's about a 45 minute tour of you looking at ice sculptures that this couple sculpted and you have a tour guide yelling at you constantly to not touch the ice and promising he'll only talk for 10 minutes, when in reality he doesn't shut up the entire time. This had been my second time visiting the museum, but mom and dad's first, so they were all giddy with excitement. They were served Appletini's in martini glasses made out of ice - how "cool"! But yeah, I don't remember much else from the tour. Oh wait, just kidding, I do. In the museum, there's 4 hotel rooms, all made of ice, that (insane) people can stay in. While attempting to push dad through one of the doors to look at the room, he got stuck on the carpet. Long story short, the carpet for the Polar Bear room is completely butchered and I'm pretty sure they know it was us. So after ruining the museum, we left and came back to the motor home and I passed out at around 6:30pm, so I don't know what my wild parents did for the rest of the night.


On Saturday (7/19), we had the opportunity to see the Golden Days parade. It's one of the largest parades in the state and literally the longest parade I've ever been to in my entire life. It lasted 3 wholeeeee hourssssss. Then after the world's longest parade, we watched 7,000 rubber ducks float down a river. Seriously. It's an actual event. You pay money to buy a duck and then if your duck is the first to cross the finish line, you win. The winner gets like $15,000. It's pretty legit, not going to lie. I bought a duck and it won, but since I'm such a good Samaritan, I donated all of my winnings to charity. After that all went down, we watched Nikki sleep. When we got bored of her, mom, dad, and I went to the Santa Claus House in North Pole. For those of you who have been to Bronner's in Frankenmuth, it's like that, but smaller. For those of you who haven't been to Bronner's, I can only describe it as Christmas heaven. Last time I was there, Santa wasn't because he was still resting up from Christmas time. But this time we got lucky and got to meet him!!!!! He was such a cute old man. 

See? Isn't he so cutie

After we met Santa and told him what we wanted for this upcoming Christmas, we went and played outside and looked at his reindeer. We had gotten there just in time because they were holding auditions for Santa's new lead. Guess who got the part?

Scotty did! (People were judging us)



Sunday (7/20) was a pretty mellow day. We headed to Silver Gulch Brewery and shoved more food into our faces. I don't know about the rest of the fam, but I was still full from the past week, yet couldn't pass up free food, so I continued to eat until I hated myself. After we all stretched our clothes to their full potential, Nikki led us on a tour of Ft. Wainwright, the army base where Andrew works. It was cool and all, but I didn't see any cute army boys, so I wasn't as interested as the rest of the family. Actually, now that I think about it, mom was passed out in the backseat so I really only think dad was listening to tour guide Nikki.


Also on Sunday, mom figured out the total number of miles we had traveled and the route we had taken - 

We started at point A in Goodrich, MI (I started at B in Houghton), and landed at point N in Fairbanks, AK, with a grand total of......................... *drum roll* 5518 miles! (For those of you who are on Facebook, you already knew this if you saw my mom's picture. Just humor us and pretend like you're shocked all over again). That's about 5500 too many miles for me, and I'm sure mom and dad too. But once we got past the point of wanting to punch each other in the throat, we were all good and having fun.. Most of the time.

Ok, once again, my bad for keeping you all waiting on this. I'll try to be more consistent with my posts, but I've just been having so much FUN that I keep forgetting. Real talk though, I'm about to start another post for this week that's already happening, so don't yell at me.

P.S. I added a design for your viewing pleasure.. You're welcome ;)

Day 6, 7, & 8: Ok, Let's Turn Around

July 11th, 12th, & 13th, 2014

ONCE AGAIN, I'M SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED THIS. WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE IN CANADA AND HAVEN'T HAD ANY WIFI. I'VE ALSO JUST KIND OF FORGOTTEN.

So Friday was day 6 of our family fun adventure. We went to Olympic National Park and North Cascades National Park. After seeing Mt. Rainier, both seemed like a waste of time. The views were gorgeous, don't get me wrong, but once you see one mountain, you kind of see them all. To save us about 4 hours of driving time, we took a neat little ferry from Port Townsend to Coupeville, WA (Nikki had called and I told her we were going to Coupeville and she thought I said Poopville. So immature). The ferry was coolio. We got front row "seats" since we were the biggest and baddest vehicle on the entire boat. Mom almost hit a motorcyclist while boarding, but she'll deny it. 

After we got off the ferry and visited North Cascades, the excitement kind of leveled out at a solid -3, on a scale of 10. We drove to our campground which was about 20 south of the Washington-Canada border, set up camp, and slept our little hearts away.


Us being such early risers, we had plans Saturday to wake up and be gone at 7am. Yeah, didn't happen at all. We finally rolled (literally for me) out of bed at about 8:30am and got on the road at 10ish. After about 20 minutes of driving in circles, trying to figure out where the heck we were supposed to cross the border at, we finally found a random line of cars and decided to join. 

The whole actual border crossing experience itself was not what I was hoping. I was thinking they'd think we were drug dealers or something and pull us over and strip search our oh-so-subtle 32ft bus. You know, like what was supposed to happen in We're The Millers (great movie by the way, 10/10 would recommend). But no, that didn't happen at all. Not even close. However, the time leading up to our crossing was pretty exciting. Dad was passed out sleeping, but mom and I had some fun. Although to be honest, all I can really remember is the good-looking guy in the car in front of us.

But if you're bored and on Twitter, search the hashtag #crossingtheborderwithlaur - I live tweeted most of the comments mom was saying during our hour and a half wait. She doesn't know it though (hehe).

After we finally crossed into the exotic country of Canada, we hit up the visitor center so I could piddle and mom could get some maps, because apparently it's not working out between her and Siri. After mom got done talking with the woman at the counter and figuring out where we were supposed to go, we both walked out of the visitor center as happy campers.

I got a cutie little Canadian flag and mug

And mom was in map heaven.

We drove for about 6 or 7 hours and made a few pit stops along the way. We drove through Hell's Gate, which is apparently some major attraction in Canada. I personally didn't see how it was different from any other mountainous part that we drove through. But what do I know, I'm only American. Then I was an adult for 0.2 seconds and purchased some fancy Canadian wine. I was greeted in the store by two 70+ year old men who were wearing extremely short jorts and no shirts and asking the clerk where the Mike's Hard Lemonade was. I tell you what, Canada's the best. We then continued on our merry little way and landed in Quesnel, British Columbia. After hearing it 23890 times, I still don't know how to pronounce Quesnel. I just know you don't say it how it looks, because that would be too simple (typical Canadians).

So then this morning we had plans, yet again, to wake up and peace out early and of course, didn't leave until 10am. I honestly don't know why we keep making these plans of leaving at the crack of dawn. I don't think we've left at our planned time once this trip. But YOLO. 

We originally headed north towards some town that's, well, north. I want to say it's like Fort St. George or something, but I know you all really don't care so whatever. We got about 5 hours north of Quesnel before we realized that the woman at the visitor center sent us on a route that was about 2 days out of our way. SO after we realized we were never going to make it to Fairbanks, we turned around and now we're on our way back to Houghton. Just kidding, we're not. Gotcha!! No, we're only like 4 hours north of Quesnel. This trip is literally taking forever. 

The goal was to make it to Fairbanks by Tuesday night, but it's looking like it'll be Wednesday. Nikki thought we were going to be there today. Ha. What a jokester that Nikki is. Oscar's been having regular piddle and poop schedules, so you all don't have to worry about that. I can't think of anything else of importance that I need to share with you all except that I saw my future husband at the the gas station today.

Sooooooooooo, until next time.

Day 5: Mom vs Mt. Rainier

July 10th, 2014

Once again, my bad for lack of consistent updates. We're having such a wild time that I'm having too much fun to blog (aka there hasn't been any cell phone service for the past 300 miles).

We peaced out of the campground at some time in the morning and trekked out towards Mt. Rainier National Park. It must've been a hoppin' ride on the way to the park because I literally don't remember one thing about it. Once we got inside the park, we didn't really know what to do so we kind of just drove around. Little did we know we'd be driving up actual mountains. With that being said, here's a little background story on mom: she hates heights, she hates drop offs, and she hates driving a 32ft bus up and around both of those things. So I'm sure you can imagine how smooth and relaxed our ride up was. In between the white knuckles and "Ohhhhh my god, oh my god" every couple of minutes, we got to see some pretty fab views.

(I thought I had more pictures of the views, but it turns out they're all selfies, sorry)

When we finally got to the view point and mom let go of the steering wheel, we were greeted by this ol' thing:

 Hi Mt. Rainier!!!!

We had the opportunity to go a little further up the mountain, but I honestly don't think we would've had a steering wheel by the end. Mom was gripping it pretttttty hard. The way down the mountain went about a billion times smoother than the way up. I mean, minus the fact that our brakes almost burned out. But that's besides the point.

After our mountain adventure, we became even more adventurous and went on a hunt for a gas station. When we finally found one, I went inside to see if they had any little souvenirs because I'm THAT person. Well, the gas station clerk just so happened to call me out on that. He saw me pick up a map of Washington, pick out a magnet, and then pick out a postcard, then said to me, "That was the most touristy thing I've ever seen anyone do." Since I was having a solid hair day, I'm going to pretend he was hitting on me rather than judging me.

We then headed out farther west so we could end up near Olympic National Park for the next day. Along the way, I began calling campgrounds to see if we could get a spot for the night. It was around 6ish by the time I started calling, so I didn't think there was going to be any trouble since most campground offices close at 8 or 9pm. Yeah, nope. Everything in Washington closes at like 4pm. Worst state ever, am I right? So after calling 6 or 7 campgrounds, I began to panic a wee bit. I jokingly (seriously) suggested that we pull into a Walmart parking lot and stake out there for the night. Mom took it into consideration and pulled into one to scope it out. Now, I don't know about everyone else's Walmart parking lots, but in Grand Blanc there's like 7 different parking lots and the whole thing is spaced way out so that if one were to actually camp there, they wouldn't be out of place or in anyone's grill. This Walmart was the exact opposite. Seriously. It's like the parking lot was only made for those stupid little Smart Cars. 

So about 5 minutes later we decided that camping in a Walmart parking lot was going to have to happen another time. We took a chance and drove to a campground in Gig Harbor, WA. I don't know how we got so lucky, but there was a spot available for a 29ft motor home. Ours is 32ft, but whatever, we lied and made it work. 



So that was our Thursday. Mom almost drove us off a cliff and we almost camped in Walmart's parking lot. I hope that was more exciting for you than our Wednesday.

Generational Travel Difference #10: Navigation

Us:  Owning a map and actually knowing where we start, where we finish and when to turn ahead of time.

Her:  Using a GPS one inch at a time as she travels and then only knowing 800 feet before it is necessary to turn, only to discover it is a left turn and you are in the right lane.



-L

Generational Travel Difference #13: Hair Care

Us:  Shampoo, Baseball Cap

Her:  Shampoo, conditioner, hair straightener, curling iron, wall mirror, hand mirror, hair ties

-L

Day 4: "Look, a buffalo! Oh just kidding, that's a cow"

July 9th, 2014

This morning we woke up early with plans to hit the road at 9:30am, so naturally it wasn't until 10 that we left. Being punctual is our strong suit, obviously.

To summarize today's events: we drove. And drove. And drove. And drove.
To highlight today's events: Oscar pooped not once, but TWICE. (Can you say best day ever?)

To my surprise, Montana turned out to not be the worst state ever. The landscape was cute and there were little cows and horses everywhere. Twas super cute. While driving, I decided to educate mom on how we should be eating grass-fed cows instead of corn-fed cows (I watched Food Inc. on Netflix, I'm basically a certified nutritionist). She wasn't impressed. However, I did get her to reenact this video with me:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gavEC5aWAzM

I'd asked both Matt and Nikki if they would lip sync Frozen with me and they both shot me down. I guess mom really didn't have a choice since if she didn't, I would've just played the song over and over until she agreed. Dad pretty much resembled the clueless daughter in the background, except without the random singing. He doesn't know the words. Yet. (He was sucking on a bottle though).


About 2 hours into the trip, mom realized we would be passing through Butte, Montana. So for the next 250 miles, she scavenged for the perfect sign so she could do this:

Finding Nemo is her favorite movie. At one point, she got so excited that she almost walked across a 5 lane freeway just so she could take a picture of her "touching the Butte". You think I'm joking.

We landed in St. Regis, Montana, which is on the border of Montana and Idaho. The campground we're staying at has grizzly bears so it will be a peaceful night sleep for all of us. 

It was a really slow day. Thanks for humoring me and reading this. Sorry to disappoint with the lack of excitement. Tomorrow we'll roll dad off a mountain or something.

P.S. Mom's reading her Butte joke and won't stop laughing again. Help.

Day 3: Nothing Was Accomplished Today

July 8th, 2014

This morning we trekked out towards Wind Cave National Park (south of Custer & Rapid City, SD). We woke up at 7am, peaced out at 8, got there at 10 for a private viewing of the cave because we're so high class (and dad's in a wheelchair. But mostly because we're high class). For those of you who have never heard of Wind Cave, I'm not surprised. It's not on most maps. I'm not even sure how we found out about it, to be honest. Actually, I take that back. I think I found out about it via Pinterest.

To get to Wind Cave, I just put into the GPS "Wind Cave National Park" and figured it would take us where we needed to go. Yeah, nope. It was literally routing us to the entrance sign, which was near a 2-track road. Having never been there before, we didn't know what was going on. So we passed the 2-track, thought about it, then backed up the motor home to go down the 2-track because Siri kept telling us to turn. And what Siri tells you to do, you do. Then we actually used our heads and realized the little 2-track was a hiking trail and motorized vehicles were not allowed. Who would've thought. 

About 45 minutes and 30 minutes past our original tour time, we finally made it to the visitor center of the park. Kim, our tour guide and underemployed geology graduate (dad asked a lot of weird questions), was not impressed. Our tour was about 20 minutes long, 15 minutes longer than Kim wanted it to last. We went down the natural 6-passenger elevators of the earth and into the lower level of the cave and then the upper level. The cave itself was actually really interesting. Kind of worth the 5 and a half hours we took out of our day to see it.

After our strenuous tour, we went to see the original natural entrance of the cave. It was about 15 inches in diameter. We weren't sure if we were allowed to take pictures inside the actual entrance or not, but we did anyways:

(Mom had a little bit more fun with this than I did. It looks bigger on TV.)

Dad got a chance to explore the cave as well:

After we spelunked for a bit, we decided our time at the cave was over.. But not without touching some butts.

Really. I don't know how we didn't get kicked out of the park. 

We didn't really do anything else today besides drive and have a rugged meal of Qdoba. We got dad set up with wifi so he's happy as a clam because it's been a hard couple days without Facebook.

Along with this fierce cat, we also saw some buffalo, elk, prairie dogs, and deer. 

We're headed out west towards Mt. Rainier, Washington. Fingers crossed we travel more than 300 miles. 

PEACE.

Day 2: This Is Literally Taking Forever

July 7th, 2014

Sorry I didn't update about our wild adventure yesterday (7/7). Consistency is not my forte. My diary is a great example of that, seeing as how I would write in it for a day, then I wouldn't write in it again until a year later (you can even ask Nikki because she would always read it).

We started the day driving about 5 hours to Badlands National Park in South Dakota. We spent quite a few hours exploring the cute little mountain formations or whatever they're called. We asked dad if he wanted to go climbing or if he wanted us to throw him off the edge of the sidewalk, but for some reason he said no to both. It's been about 17 years since we've visited the Badlands and the entire way I was asked if I remembered doing this or doing that. No mom and dad, I don't. I was 3. 

Matt called while I was in the middle of taking a selfie and said that he missed us and that he wants us to come home. Or something along those lines, I don't really know, I didn't talk to him. 

After we did some tromping around, we drove for approximately a million more miles and ended up at Mount Rushmore. Fun fact if you're planning on visiting Mount Rushmore anytime soon: there is now a bar. So you can drink while enjoying a presentation about Washington, Lincoln, Roosevelt, & Jefferson. It's what they would've wanted.

The whole presentation was anti-climatic, really. Mom was going on about how the lighting of the monument was extravagant and dramatic and everything. Yeah, it wasn't. The whole thing was about 45 minutes total aka 40 minutes too long. The girl presenting was butchering the presidents' names and we couldn't even see the film being shown. So naturally, I left to go get food and scope out the gift shop. I came back and still nothing had happened. Then they played "America the Beautiful" and still nothing had happened. Then they played the National Anthem and at that time the lights had finally started to pathetically flicker and eventually the whole thing lit up. I'm sure 3 year old me would've loved it, but 20 year old me was not the least bit impressed. 

While everyone was being touristy and taking cute pictures, I see my mom take a picture and then say to herself, "Oh shoot, they have red eye!"........ Oh mom. You're so silly. Her and my dad didn't stop laughing until we got back to the shack, 20 minutes later. So embarrassing. So if any of you are Facebook friends with her, that's why she didn't post a picture of Mount Rushmore.

We ended up in Hills City, SD for the night. We got lucky with another KOA having an available spot for our fun little fam. It was 11pm before we even started to settle in. Way past our bedtime so that's why I couldn't blog for all ya'll. 

P.S. My mom is reading over this right now and came to her joke about Mount Rushmore and is once again laughing. A lot. She must be tired.

Day 1: Holy S***, What Were We Thinking

July 6th, 2014

BACKGROUND: The fam has been trying to get a motor home ever since my dad's accident back in 2007. We finally got one. Nikki's in Alaska (and way pregnant & Andrew's overseas). We're heading across the country/continent to go visit her in our spiffy new motor home - because why go camping for a weekend, an hour away, when you can go camping for a whole month, 5,000 miles away? We VanSumeren's like to go big or go home (not really).

So my mom asked me if I would write a blog about our trip to keep the family posted (I'm only doing this for you, Grams). I don't blog or know necessarily how or what to say in a blog, so I'm going to pretend it's like my 4th grade diary. But don't worry, I'll spare you who my future husband will be. But please bear with me, I'm awkward. 


Anyways, it's day one of our cross country trek. I don't know about the parentals, but all I'm thinking is "holy s***, this is insane, whose idea was this?" We're currently in Jackson, MN, which is about 5 hours outside of our first major planned stop.  We drove for about 10 hours and traveled 500ish miles. I'm already sick of sitting in this motor home and I'm sure my mom and dad can say the same. Literally nothing exciting happened today except that Oscar pooped for the first time in 2 days. That was the highlight of our day. I wish I was joking. 

Since we didn't know the exact date of when we would be getting the motor home, complete with modifications for my dad, we weren't able to make reservations at any campgrounds along the way. Aka we're 110% winging this whole trip. Lucky for us wild cats though, we were about an hour outside of Jackson and called some random campground I found on Google Maps and they had some empty spots. I have a feeling it's not always going to be like that and we'll end up in some random Walmart parking lot for the night. The only plus side to that will be that the people watching will be spectacular. 

I don't know what else I'm supposed to fill you in about. My lunch? How I already have cankles? That I secretly think Oscar pooped somewhere in the motor home & I'm afraid to tell my mom about it?  (Only slightly kidding about that last one, ma)



If I knew what the heck I was doing, I'd post some cute pictures for you all to enjoy. But I don't. So let's take a raincheck on that one. 

Ok, later.